This past week marked several firsts for me:
– A first time to substitute teach a PE class. I’ve done this several times now, in fact, and it’s quite enjoyable. I even managed to convince one class that the proper way to count-off stretches was by counting up to 85 by tens. This left them very confused, but none the worse for the experience.
– A first time to make bread from scratch. Here it is in all it’s glory:
It did not come about, though, without some agony. As soon the flour touched my hands, cold shivers shot down what remains of my spine (all of my spine remains, actually, I was just trying to modify the cliche to make it less of one). Andy (known to you, perhaps, as “Jafar”) and I both have this weakness. Peach fuzz, flour, or anything with that same questionable texture is enough to keep us out of the kitchen for weeks at a time. Until I tasted the stuff that came out of the over, I had sworn never to put myself through such chills again. Now I have unsworn.
– A first time to feel an earthquake. That’s right. In the middle of second period today, the room swaggered and swayed. The portable whiteboard in the corner turned topsy-turvy on us, and the students said, “Can you feel it, Mr. Halbrooks? It’s an earthquake!” And then another said (mockingly), “Stay calm! Everyone STAY calm.” I, meanwhile, watched the ceiling closely, fearing yet another cave-in.
When all was said and done, my students informed me that such jolts are common around these parts, and rarely dangerous.
Me: How often, would you say?
They: Oh, I’d say once every two weeks.
Other They: No, Joey, not that often.
They: Ok, once every month.
Other They: Noooo. Once every two months.
Me: So… are we right on the edge of a plate, then?
They: We’re in the Ring of Fire, Mr. Halbrooks.
Me: Right, but are we on the edge of a plate?
They: The Ring of Fire, Mr. Halbrooks.
Though some diabolical thoughts did cross my mind, you’ll be happy to know this did not result in yet another first.
And, for your edification, we are not (in fact) on the very edge of a plate, just mighty close: